Planning the "Essentials"

Okay, I was going to call this inaugural post "Planning the Poop," but thought that'd be too much information at the beginning. But, I had a relevation this morning about the evolution of the human female, most notably, the process of elimination (a much more delicate definition).

Like many other females may have definitely noticed, men take an inordinate amount of time to use the bathroom. If a man is absent from the room for more than 20 minutes and can't be found, well you really know where he is. Men take soooooo long to do their business, it can be a problem, especially when you only have one bathroom! Anyways, most men I know take reading material with them since they're gonna be in their for the long haul (and it isn't pleasant afterword but that's another story).

All I know is most women go into the bathroom, sit down and before you can read a paragraph in this weeks People magazine, you're done. Simple as that. However, now that I'm the mother of a 22-month-old, active healthy baby boy, I know why that is.

This morning he woke me up at 4:30 (waaa--plop in goes the pacifier for a little more rest, hopefully). Not long after that I hear thumps and vocalizations, but I'm not concerned. He has a habit of waking up and kicking the wall as if to say, "WAKE UP MOMMY!" But lately, yes lately he's been playing the Danger Boy game. Instead of just contently fussing in his crib, he's been crawling/climbing out and getting into trouble. At this age, it is exploration time.

So, now with his wandering ways I need to figure out the where's and when's of normal life--breakfast, a shower, and yes, elimination. THAT'S why women can take care of the potty business so quickly. We've evolved so we can one minute toot and poop and the next disentangle the fly strip from our child's hands.

Yup, that's it. Pure evolution. I got lots to learn about motherhood!